Here’s The Liner Notes

Since The Michael Farmer Collection by Kentucky Prophet won’t get a physical release, here is my attempt at liner notes.


To the best of my knowledge:

1.Kentucky Prophet Theme Song  2. Holland  3. Somehooow  4. Valet Parking At The Player’s Ball 

Produced by Ian Gaffney/Colin Smith.

Written by Farmer/Gaffney/C. Smith. Recorded 2002-2003, North Hollywood, Cal. Released as part of the Kentucky Prophet Brain Rap EP, 2005.

Programmed and instrumentation by Gaffney/Smith.

Colin and Ian gave me the nickname “Kentucky Prophet”. It’s better if someone gives you a nickname than if you give yourself one. If you google “Kentucky Prophet”, you’ll likely come up with a bunch of stuff about the late somnambulist Edgar Cayce. 

5. Orcs & Goblins  6. Poor Confetti  7. Physical  8. I’m Here If You Need Me

Produced by Taylor Smith/Michael Farmer.

Recorded 2002-2003, Sherman Oaks, Cal. Previously Unreleased.

“Orcs & Goblins” written by Farmer. “Physical” is a cover of the Olivia Newton-John song, written by Terry Shaddick and Steve Kipner. “I’m Here If You Need Me” and “Poor Confetti” written by Farmer/T. Smith.

“Orcs & Goblins” keyboards Farmer, other instrumentation unsure. Other songs instrumentation by Taylor Smith, vocals by Michael Farmer.

Taylor invited me to move to L.A. in 2001. None of the music in this collection gets recorded if not for that life-changing moment. We had a two-man band and these four songs represent that. I lived there for a year-and-a-half. 

 9. Intro  10. I Sell Drugs To Celebrities  11. Yes Men  12. Drink To Kill The Pain  13. It’s A Wonderful Life  14. Good Time Girl

Produced by Colin Smith/Ian Gaffney.

Recorded 2007, Brooklyn, NY.

Released as part of the Kentucky Prophet album Beyond The Fringe.

All songs written by Farmer/Gaffney/C. Smith.

Instrumentation and programming by C. Smith and Gaffney except for accordion on “Drink To Kill The Pain” by Meryl Young. Girl singer on “It’s A Wonderful Life” unknown (sorry).

Colin and Ian lived in the same apartment complex as me and Taylor. I would go over to their place and bother them. By 2007, they had moved back to the east coast and I joined them for a week to make an album. I spent a week in Brooklyn and I never left the apartment because I was focused on recording.

 15. The Concept Of You  16. We All Got Blues  17. Die Alone

Produced by Russell Brooks. Recorded 2010/2011., Bowling Green, KY.

Released as part of the Mike Farmer album Dolphin.

All songs written by Michael Farmer.

Guitar by Shelby Smith. Drums by Nick Clark. Keyboards/vocals by Michael Farmer. Bass/guitar/programming by Russell Brooks.

I retired the name “Kentucky Prophet” and decided to try my way as a singer-songwriter while simultaneously fronting the band Technology Vs. Horse (they’re also on Spotify). “The Concept Of You” was inspired by a Harry Belafonte documentary. We built the songs up around my piano playing but I didn’t release it for years. 

 18. The Past  19. Mountain Music  20. Learning To Live Without You

Recorded by Patrick Richardson.

Recorded 2013, Greenville, Ky.

Released as part of the Mike Farmer album Greenville 2013.

All songs written by Michael Farmer.

Piano/vocals by Michael Farmer.

I also didn’t release this for years after I recorded it. I recorded it in a church because someone advised me to record my piano songs in a good room with a good sound. 

21. Jesus Without Mary

Produced by Russell Brooks.

Recorded 2018/2019, Bowling Green, Ky.

Released as a stand-alone single.

Written by Michael Farmer.

Piano/vocals by Michael Farmer. String arrangement by Russell Brooks.

This is the first song I recorded after my band TVH broke up in 2017. I released it on bandcamp like I did the Dolphin and Greenville albums. I did a basic track and left it to Russell to fill it. 





Coming To Spotify: The Michael Farmer Collection

If you love music, and you like me, you will be pleased by the impending digital release of The Michael Farmer Collection by Kentucky Prophet.

Twenty-one songs from my entire career, including some previously unreleased. It’s a weird, wonderful world and story. Available to all major streaming platforms.

Do you like rock ‘n roll? Rap music? Pop music? Bizarre tangents that go nowhere? Do you like to laugh? To cry? To ponder why you are even on this planet? Do you like songs about orcs and goblins? YES, ALL OF THAT IS INCLUDED.

The track listing isn’t finalized yet but one song that will definitely be there is “It’s A Wonderful Life”.


Do you TikTok? You can play these songs on there? Do you Spotify? Same thing? Pandora? Same thing. If it’s a streaming platform used on this planet, I guarantee you The Michael Farmer Collection by Kentucky Prophet is on there.

This is a strange world and strange times we live in. I have no idea what the future holds so I wanted to put some of my best and favorite songs. I hope you enjoy this no matter your preferred listening platform or gender pronoun.

When the album is out, I’ll give more information, especially about the unreleased songs. If this music seems like it’s from an alternate universe, it might be because the world has changed so much between now and then. Especially recently.

Let’s Get Together And Sing “Imagine”

I find myself with so much to say and yet I am at a loss for words. A month ago, there was no coronavirus as far as you and I were concerned. This thing has us on our heels. Our lives have been disrupted, privately and collectively. So what the hell can you possibly say about it while it’s still going on?

This is a great country if you’re a winner. If you’re the kind of person who can do a viral video of singing John Lennon’s “Imagine” with your fellow celebrities, it’s an incredible country. And if you can make it all the way through that video without your stomach turning, it’s a comfortable place to live indeed. But it’s a tough place for the rest of us. The rent is due at the beginning of the month, even though a third of country is unemployed. Half the country can’t afford a $500 emergency. The coronavirus is beyond that.

The coronavirus is something you and I didn’t know about a month ago, but other people did. The president knew, his advisors, a lot of people in Washington knew. All the top executives in big business knew months ago. All the stuff we’re doing now: the social distance, the wearing of masks, the self-isolation. We could have done that months ago to keep these number of cases and deaths down. That didn’t happen. We could have been told in February to stay at home and wear masks and not hoard toilet paper and hand sanitizer. But that didn’t happen. Because the economy was too important.

Hundreds of thousands of Americans could die. I and my loved ones could die. Because the people who run this country bungled this whole thing. Because the economy was too important. All of our hopes and dreams and goals for this year and beyond, yours and mine, all thrown into helicopter blades because of the political and professional hopes of the stupidest people imaginable.

You need to remember this because this is an election year and you need to hold them to account for what they’ve done. Are you going to tolerate four more years of the emotions that you feel right now?

Election 2020: Just Find Out

Super Tuesday 1 AM.

A third of the delegates for the Democratic presidential primary are up for grabs on Super Tuesday. Between Saturday and Tuesday, we were left with four major candidates left in the race: Joe Biden, Michael Bloomberg, Bernie Sanders and Elizabeth Warren.

Joe Biden won decisively in Saturday’s South Carolina primary, garnering thirty-nine delegates. Sanders gained the rest. Billionaire Tom Steyer finished third and dropped out of the race. Within twenty-four hours, Pete Buttigieg and Amy Klobuchar also suspended their campaigns. . . but endorsed Biden, as did former Texas congressman/Presidential candidate Beto O’Rourke.


It’s appalling to me that folks object to the idea of Sanders because either a. he’s an independent and not a Democrat or b. some of his fans are aggressive bordering on mean. Have you ever been online before? This is an online culture that communicates in memes, and they aint always nice.


This internet is the wild, wild west. Imagine the other extreme of that. A draconian nightmare.

As far as Sanders not being a Democrat. . . what’s wrong with that? I registered as a Democrat when I was eighteen, but that doesn’t make me so. We’re not one party or the other. We’re Americans and we oughta act like it. This country is divided online where we share memes and scream at each other. In the real world, we mix together. When we try to talk to each other about stuff, it gets awkward. We don’t know how to communicate and we come away from the conversation entrenched in our beliefs. But hopefully we can go back and try again another day.

As for me, I see Klobuchar and Buttigieg and O’Rourke stumping for Biden before Super Tuesday and it makes perfect sense. They’re afraid of losing to Trump, but they’re also afraid of what would happen if Bernie were to win in November. What would happen if Bernie became the President and the leader of the Democratic party? How would he reshape their platform, their agenda?

The magic number is 1,991. That’s the number of delegates need to win the nomination on the first ballot. Bernie has 60. Biden has 54. I assume Buttigieg and Klobuchar will pledge their combined 33 delegates to Biden for a total of 87. Warren has 8. That makes the score Bernie 60, Everybody Else 95. If nobody gets 1,991 on the first ballot at the Democratic National Convention in July, then things get incredibly complicated and I don’t have the time or aspirin to write about it.

I’m scared that if Bernie is nominated he won’t be able to win in November. I don’t think he’ll be able to accomplish everything he’s talking about if he wins. I’ve seen this a million times. It is the pleading of those who want to retain what hasn’t been eroded by Trump. It is completely understandable.

I’m forty-two years old. I’ve seen some things given to the public but I’ve seen more taken away. I want more. I want the public to have what it is entitled to. I want someone who will fight for us. Not himself. Us.

Frank Zappa Albums as dril Tweets



The late rock star/composer/guitarist Frank Zappa (d. 1993) and weird twitter account dril aren’t for everybody but the people love them think they’re the pinnacle of their respective mediums.

Zappa did not live to see the instantaneous, random online world but one might imagine he would have thrived in it. By himself and with his band the Mothers of Invention, he released over fifty albums in his lifetime. I decided to describe them using dril tweets. If you can think of a better way, you do it.

It’s not a definitive list but that’s okay. Art is subjective. There is no God.

FreakOut! Freak Out (1966)

FrankZappa-AbsolutelyFree Absolutely Free (1967)

Zappamoney2 We’re Only In It For The Money (1968)

Verve_Lumpy_Gravy Lumpy Gravy (1968)

Frank_Zappa_-_Uncle_Meat Uncle Meat (1969)

Frank_Zappa_-_Cruising_With_Ruben_&_the_Jets Cruising with Ruben & The Jets (1968)


Hot_Rats_(Frank_Zappa_album_-_cover_art) Hot Rats (1969)


Burnt Weeny Sandwich & Weasels Ripped My Flesh (1970)

The title track to “Weasels Ripped My Flesh”, the second most inscrutable Zappa album.



Chunga’s Revenge, Fillmore East – June 1971, Frank Zappa’s 200 Motels, and Just Another Band From L.A. (1970-1972)

Video below: Zappa with his two fat sons Flo & Eddie on lead vocals


Waka/Jawaka & The Grand Wazoo (1972)

Frank-Zappa-Overnite-Sensation-1973-cover Over-Nite Sensation (1973)

Apostrophe_(') Apostrophe (‘) (1974)

Video below: Zappa and the Mothers singing “Stinkfoot”


Roxy & Elsewhere & One Size Fits All (1974-1975)

Zappa_Bongo_Fury Bongo Fury (with Captain Beefheart, 1975)


Captain Beefheart and Frank Zappa: two bearded intellectuals

Zappa_Zoot_Allures Zoot Allures (1976)


Zappa_in_New_York Zappa In New York (1978)

Studio Tan, Sleep Dirt & Orchestra Favorites (1978-1979)

Sheik Yerbouti & Joe’s Garage (1979)

Fan-made video for “Dancin’ Fool” from Sheik Yerbouti


Tinseltown Rebellion & You Are What You Is (1981)

Shut Up ‘N Play Yer Guitar & Frank Zappa: Guitar (1981, 1988)

Frank_Zappa_-_Ship_Arriving_Too_Late_to_Save_a_Drowning_Witch Ship Arriving Too Late To Save A Drowning Witch (1982)

“Valley Girl” from Ship Arriving…, a duet with daughter Moon Zappa (his only Top 40 song)

The_Man_From_Utopia The Man From Utopia (1983)

London Symphony Orchestra & The Perfect Stranger: Boulez Conducts Zappa (1983-1984, 1987)

Zappa_Them_or_Us Them Or Us (1984)

Zappa_Thing-Fish Thing-Fish (1984)

I know I posted that tweet already. Here’s “The Mammy Nuns” from Thing-Fish, the most inscrutable Zappa album.

Francesco Zappa, Frank Zappa Meets The Mothers Of Prevention & Jazz From Hell (1984-1986)

Frank_Zappa,_Does_Humor_Belong_In_Music Does Humor Belong In Music? (1986)

Zappa_Broadway_The_Hard_Way Broadway The Hard Way (1988)

You Can’t Do That On Stage Anymore, Volumes 1-6, Playground Psychotics & Ahead Of Their Time (1988-1993)

Frank_Zappa,_Make_A_Jazz_Noise_Here Make A Jazz Noise Here (1991)

Zappa-best-band-2 The Best Band You Never Heard In Your Life (1991)

Frank_Zappa,_Yellow_Shark The Yellow Shark (1993)

Video: “G-Spot Tornado” from The Yellow Shark. Zappa conducts the Ensemble Modern in his last public appearance, September 1992.

Frank_Zappa,_Civilization_Phaze_III Civilization, Phaze III (posthumous, 1994)


She Was My Hero

Don’t read this if you don’t want to cry

My grandmother passed away December 21, 2019.

I am going to tell you about the time she saved my life. It is not my fondest memory of her, just my deepest.

We lived in Hammond, Indiana where winters were cold and icy and snow would pile up deep into the spring. I don’t remember exactly when this happened but it was so cold that giant icicles hung off the edges of the buildings.

It seems almost unthinkable now that little kids walked by themselves down a city street. Granny used to walk me to school but she stopped because she hurt her leg falling through a porch. My mom wasn’t there because she worked the graveyard shift. I didn’t have a dad. Granny picked up the slack. One winter day, I walked home with another kid from class.

We got to the corner where I lived, on a second floor of a two-story apartment building. The icicles hung so low off the building that he grabbed a piece and broke it off. He wielded it like a club. It was thick like a nightstick made of ice. The look on his face became menacing.

He said he wouldn’t start chasing me until the count of ten. If I got in before then, he wouldn’t hit me.

In spite of (or perhaps because of) being chased by someone with a nightstick-thick icicle, I made it to the front door. Two doors between me and safety. I could see my grandmother’s kind, smiling warm face in the window behind them. I just needed to get inside and I’d be safe.

He never got to ten. . . but he swung down on my head anyway. Now that I’m older I ask myself when would he have been satisfied? When I cried? I was already crying. When he saw blood? There was blood. If I stopped moving entirely?

For so long, I was mad at my granny for not opening that door and getting me to safety. I never considered that she had no idea what was going on. That she saw me walking down the street from the window upstairs and missed everything afterwards. How difficult it must have been for her to get down the stairs in the first place.

I never thanked her for coming outside and scaring him away before he really did me in. For getting me up the stairs and comforting me when I was terrified.

She was always there for me throughout my life. I never doubted her love. It was a grandmother’s love when I was little boy, called into duty to be a mother’s love for a second tour while my mother supported us working a graveyard shift.

I loved my granny but I was mad at her. Like a child gets mad.

I’m sorry, Granny. Thank you a million times. Forgive me. I might not be here if not for you. Your deepest memory of me is probably different than mine of yours. Hopefully it was happier. 


Path To Inevitability: January Edition

IT’S A NEW YEAR! Eleven months to go before the crushing inevitability of the 2020 Election.

Trump will take on Democrat TBD if he doesn’t stroke out or get impeached before then. In Kentucky, we have incumbent Senator and Majority Leader Fuckface (R) running for a seventh term.

The most likely winner of the Democratic primary as of right now is retired Marine fighter pilot Amy McGrath who looks like she coaches women’s basketball.


McGrath has a $9 million dollar war chest. She will need every bit of it to compete with Fuckface this year. She also has VALUABLE HOLLYWOOD ENDORSEMENTS.


Thanks, Grace. Love your show. McGrath’s platform consists of “woman fighter pilot/not Mitch McConnell” which could won’t work.

There are some other candidates: Mike Broihier and Steven Cox. Wait. . . Steven didn’t make the cutoff for entering into the primary. I asked him what happened.





At least he got a blue Twitter checkmark out of it. So he’s got that going for him.

So it’s Amy McGrath and everyone else. . . except a promising contender has entered the race. State Rep. Charles Booker put his hat in the ring last week.

Booker said he won’t be accepting money from a super PAC because of his “conviction” that big money ostracizes regular people from the political process.

“The majority of us in Kentucky are broke,” he said.

He believes he has a more powerful message for the time than McGrath does — on guns, for instance, Booker said he will keep a mandate to both respect the right to bear arms as protected in the Constitution and a moral obligation to keep Kentucky families safe.

Booker said what excites him most is the response from voters who trust him to advance the struggle of everyday Kentuckians. Without naming names, in one moment of candor over the phone, Booker said he was perplexed by leaders who say they want to beat Trump, but are unable to engage in the complex range of the political left’s thoughts, opinions, and anxieties. . .

Booker is pushing a progressive platform (Green New Deal, Medicare For All) as non-partisan solutions for Kentuckians. It’s risky but is it any riskier than McGrath’s pro-Trump Democrat gambit?

McGrath and Booker are both threatening enough to McConnell that whenever I type their names in Google search, I get these ads at the top.


If you’re scared, say you’re scared. Fuckface.



Look At Me, See Me In Control

Here I am. I’m in my car, in the driver’s seat. My sunglasses are on.


found online, creator unknown

This is my profile picture. This is my Facebook and Twitter picture. Friends, family, strangers, especially the people on Hillary Clinton’s Facebook page. This is the face they see when they read my words. This is the image they have of me when my WORDS OF TRUTH are searing into their brain.

I have many pictures of myself in this car with my sunglasses on. This is the best one.

I’m in control of my car when I drive my car. I’m in the driver’s seat, and no one can tell me what to do unless I’m at a checkpoint or whatever. It’s annoying to have to pull out my license but hey if you’re not doing anything wrong, you won’t get caught, right?

I leave work and go home to my hot wife while all these neo-marxists and liberals stay depressed because they have no purpose in life. I’ve learned a lot in the last few year because I’ve been reading. With no ledge because power and with power comes control. I am in control of my situation. It helps to be have knowledge when you discuss things online because when you do that you know people are going to attack. They’re not in control. They’re not happy. They don’t even post inspirational quotes and Bible versus on their Facebook pages! Because they don’t have any spiritual nature. They have no purpose and they’re have no control.

I sometimes wonder if they have a car to drive lol!

I got into an argument with my cousin over the holidays. He’s a lefty liberal so you have to take what he says with a grain of salt but he said that my car selfie is about insecurity. I asked him what he was talking about. He said that it was all about the illusion of control. Because the car is the only situation in my life where I feel like I’m truly in control. I’m not in control at work or home. I’m just another rat in the race. He said to me, “Now that Trump’s in office, do you feel like you won the war on Christmas?” And I told him HELL NO! IT’S A WAR YOU GOTTA KEEP FIGHTING! People will the forget the meaning of it if you let them.

So even though I have the President I want and the economy’s doing really well and I get to have sex with my hot wife (when she wants lol), I’m not really in control on anything. I’m not actually winning. I’m not really happy after all.

He had the nerve to say to say all that to me. In my house. During the holidays. I got him a good pair of sunglasses for Christmas and this is how he replays me! It took all my strength not to just take them back.

That’s what control is. If he understood that, he wouldn’t have said all that about me to me.

I hired someone to edit this for me. He’s correcting the spelling mistakes and putting all the punctuation in all the right places. I will lock at it later and hope for the best. I don’t see any red lines underneath any words so I assume he did it properly. I found him on fiverr. He assures me that fiverr will have that red underline on it no matter what we do. You won’t see it. He used to work at a newspaper.

I am in control now. Get used to it.

I could also be a bot. Coin flip.





So Much For Xmas

I got a call Saturday morning, December 21st around 9:36 am. My mother called to tell me that her mother, my grandmother, had passed away. She was eighty-one.

Usually, we’d have a nice little Christmas celebration. My mother would go get Granny from the Roosevelt House so she could enjoy a rare day out of the house and see her two daughters, four grandchildren and four great-grandchildren (now a fifth on the way who will miss out).

I last saw her for Thanksgiving. She didn’t look like she had less than a month to go, although it was clear she wasn’t doing well. Arthritis took over her body, even her jaw and eyes. I cannot imagine the pain she must have been in that final year. She had a brand new scooter that probably had less than a mile on it.

My grandmother was a sweet lady who loved her family and her cat. She had a warm smile and was great to have a chat with. Talking was painful and the sound of her voice changed due to the arthritis. Granny would throw so many treats on the floor, the cat got up to twenty-three pounds at one point. I have Granny’s old flip phone as a hand-me-down and it still has a bunch of photos she took of the cat. She took photos of the TV while she watched the Country Music Awards. Sometimes she hit the button when she didn’t mean to and there’s accidental pictures of nothing. I kept them them all.

We had to put the cat down Thursday because it couldn’t keep food down any longer. By then, the poor thing was three pounds. The cat Thursday, Granny’s funeral a week later. We’re going to plant some of Granny’s funeral home tulips where we buried the cat. Granny is being cremated, and in my opinion we should put the ashes with the cat. We’re taking them to her parents’ burial plot next month. That works.

I had a sinking feeling she wouldn’t make it to Christmas 2020, but I didn’t expect her to miss this one. So if you think the time you have with someone is limited, make it meaningful if only for your own peace of mind. You don’t want that regret to work on your mind. Get as much as you can out of this dumb life, because you have no control over how much suffering you have to endure and you have no idea when it will be over.



And there you have it: that is my last blog of the decade. I didn’t want to end on such a down note but sometimes that’s how it shakes out. December 21 is the first day of the winter solstice. As such, it is the shortest day of the year and from there the days get longer. You could look at that as a bad thing, but I don’t. Each day becomes longer than the last, as if the sun is regaining its’ strength.

Let Me Entertain You

I started making music when I was nineteen years old. For the first few years, it wasn’t very good. I have most of my recorded output on my Bandcamp where you can listen to some of it and download it.

If you’ll indulge me, I’d like to give myself a Rolling Stone-type handjob and pick nine songs throughout my “career” that are on my Bandcamp.

A Boy Named Nostalgia (Mr. Neutron: Scrapheap, 1999

UPDATE: I decided to make this private. It’s my first ever album and it’s embarrassing. Message me if you really want it (you don’t).

Learning To Live Without You (Mike Farmer: Greenville 2013)

Someone in the music business told me to record an album for his label in a nice room. I recorded in a church. It never got released.

Sulpher (Mr. Neutron: Sulpher Promo EP, 2000)

I recorded a four-track promo EP. The chorus and music was inspired by Jimmy Buffett’s “Son Of A Son Of A Sailor”, a song I never listened to. The EP costs $3. Whatever.

Holland (Kentucky Prophet: Brain Rap, 2005)

This 2005 EP was recorded when I still lived in Los Angeles. The Beach Boys-esque melody and lyrics were written years earlier but fit perfectly with the east coast groove. I had new collaborators and released the EP when I returned to Kentucky. Brain Rap costs $7 but it’s worth paying for and it has a bonus remix.

Valet Parking At The Player’s Ball (Kentucky Prophet: Brain Rap, 2005)

This song and “Holland” are the two Brain Rap songs that I played the most live and this one shows the comedy element the deepest. It’s a funny song about a parking lot employee taking revenge on the richie-riches whose cars he parks.

I Sell Drugs To Celebrities (Kentucky Prophet, Beyond The Fringe, 2007)

A trip to Brooklyn resulted in Beyond The Fringe. This was the first full track, a creative use of alliteration while making fun of celebrity culture and mixing in conspiracy theory at the end. Great use of Donovan sample, too. This album costs $7 but it’s worth it.

Full Of It (Kentucky Prophet, Beyond The Fringe, 2007)

Condensed from the full title, the never-performed “Everybody’s Full Of It (So Are We)” is sung rather than rapped and features scratching from co-producer DJ Cappel. It’s somber tone addresses pride going before the fall, also applied to hip-hop (at least circa mid-2000s).

Mountain Music (Mike Farmer, Greenville 2013, 2019)

“Mountain Music” is about playing bluegrass music at a funeral. Greenville 2013 is available for download. You can pay what you wish.

Normal Love (Mike Farmer, Dolphin, 2019)

“Normal Love” was written in the early ’00s. This piano ballad has a Beach Boys influence but by Dennis Wilson instead of Brian. Dolphin is available via pay-what-you-wish download. The title is irrelevant to the content.

Jesus Without Mary (Mike Farmer, single, 2019)

This standalone single was the first new original music I released since the breakup of my band Technology Vs. Horse. I wanted to release it in time for the holidays of 2018 but I couldn’t finish it in time so it wasn’t released until a few months later. It’s as close to a Christmas song as I’ll ever do but it’s also as personal as I’ll ever get. This download is pay-what-you-wish.